Divorce in Germany
Since 1977 it doesn't matter in Germany in a divorce case whose fault a divorce was, there are no punitive damages awarded.
So as far as German law sees it, your husband/wife could have had 10 affairs or for that matter you could have had them, it will not affect the treatment by the court or the alimony awarded or who the children will live with (in 90% of cases the mother, if the child is under 14, the percentage is higher).
Anyone English who is thinking of getting divorced in Germany should, as a preliminary step, find out whether there might be jurisdiction for them to file for a divorce in England.
This is potentially crucially important as the financial outcome of a divorce in England may be very different from the financial outcome of a divorce in Germany.
Furthermore, under Brussels II, whichever spouse files for a divorce first in time secures jurisdiction in that country.
Thus, it is essential to establish which country you want to file in and do so before the other spouse does.
When getting a divorce in Germany the first step is to consult a lawyer.
Get a Fachanwalt for Familienrecht - this means the lawyer has passed special exams on family law and has done a minimum number of divorces, basically, that lawyer is specialised in divorces.
Since all lawyers cost the same, there's no advantage getting someone who is not qualified.
If you don't know yet whether you want to file for divorce, the lawyer can charge you for the initial consultation (Erstberatung), maximum 226.10 euro (more usual is about 150 euro), see § 34 (1) RVG (in English):
https://www.gesetze-im-internet.de/engl ... html#p0280
However, if you are sure on filing for divorce you can just engage him/her to do so and he/she can't charge you that initial consultation fee, just the lawyer's fees for the whole divorce case calculated below.
If you now only get and pay for the initial consultation, i.e. if you are not yet sure you want to divorce and only later on hire him/her for the divorce, he/she has to credit what was charged for the initial consultation towards his/her fee, this is laid down in § 34 (2) RVG (in English):
https://www.gesetze-im-internet.de/engl ... html#p0280
On no account sign a "Honorarvereinbarung" with your lawyer, this would allow him/her to charge you more than according to the law governing their cost (RVG-Rechtsanwaltsvergütungsgesetz).
If you have a low income your lawyer should apply for the German state to pay for your divorce (Prozesskostenhilfe):
https://www-familienrechtsinfo-de.trans ... r_pto=wapp
It is understood that when you start earning more, you will pay the German state back, but no interest is charged.
Look for one here (click on "Erweiterte Suche):
https://anwaltauskunft.de/magazin
- PLZ/Ort: your town
- Fachanwältin/Fachanwalt: Familienrecht
- nur Fachanwältinnen/Fachanwälte: An
- Fremdsprache: Englisch
There will be loads of lawyers fulfilling above criteria in your town.
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You should also know that your lawyer and your husband's/wife's lawyer will always try to reach a settlement (Vereinbarung, Vergleich), since this means they get more fees.
This effect is intended by the German state since it saves work for the courts and you will see the judge encouraging it very insistently (well, it saves her/him work, that way she/he won't have to write a ruling!), which is also why the court fees go down in the case of a Vergleich.
In case of a Vergleich, budget about 5% more than the result of the below divorce cost calculator.
The lawyer and court fees are calculated according to the "value" of the lawsuit (= Streitwert or Gegenstandswert).
It is based on your and your spouse's net incomes and about the property that has to be divided.
Please also read this article, since there are regional differences to how the "value" of the lawsuit gets calculated:
https://www-advoscheidung-de.translate. ... r_pto=wapp
You can find a divorce fee calculator here, to give a first idea what a divorce in Germany costs:
https://familienanwaelte-dav.de/de/sche ... tenrechner
For example, if:
- husband's monthly net income is 4,000€: fill into "Monatliches Nettoeinkommen Ehemann": 4000
- wife's monthly net income is 2,000€: fill into "Monatliches Nettoeinkommen Ehefrau": 2000
- 5% of all the joint assets that need to be divided in the divorce is 20,000€, then fill into "5% des tatsächlich vorhandenen Vermögens": 20000
- there is one kid, fill into "Anzahl unterhaltsberechtigter Kinder": 1
- both husband and wife only pay into German public pension insurance (= gesetzliche Rentenversicherung), then fill in: 2
and you will get as the result that the divorce will cost you
4,713.85€:
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Alimony for spouse during separation (Trennungsunterhalt):
From the time of filing for divorce until the divorce is pronounced, the spouse who earns more has to pay the spouse who earns less alimony during the time of separation (Trennungsunterhalt).
However, "Trennungsunterhalt" is only due from the time your lawyer formally asks for it from your husband/wife and the court, e.g. if your lawyer just remembers about the Trennungsunterhalt 6 months after filing for divorce, that's just your bad luck for the time before (no, this is not a joke, I saw such a case, it happened to a non-German neighbour who had hired a lawyer who was not a Fachanwalt für Familienrecht).
Of course you could sue your lawyer to get it from him - they all have professional liability insurance.
But you would have to prove that you had asked them to actually apply for Trennungsunterhalt, which is a bit hard if you only ever talk to your lawyer, i.e. if you do not communicate by e-mail to have a written record.
Of course, these kinds of mistakes do not happen if you hire a Fachanwalt/Fachanwältin specialised in family law.
Trennungsunterhalt is usually calculated as follows, if you have the child and your spouse is the higher earner:
- if only your husband/wife earns: 3/7 of (95% of his/her net income - child alimony)
- if both of you earn: half of difference between (95% of his/her net income - child alimony) and (95% of your net income)
Trennungsunterhalt calculator (it assumes that there are no children, scroll down on that page until you get to it!):
https://www.unterhalt.net/ehegattenunte ... unterhalt/
If the husband earns 4,000€ net a month and the wife 2,000€ net a month, the husband has to pay the wife 814.29€ a month in Trennungsunterhalt:
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